I will be competing in my first 1/2 marathon this weekend...WOW! I already feel like I am a "runner" but once I do this race I will really feel like I am in the special runners group. We already know I am in a "special" group but that's a different topic for a different time...or maybe one that doesn't even need to be explained.
I remember a long time ago my BFF Bry training and running in her first 1/2 marathon. Watching her journey I was so proud but also envious and maybe even a little jealous. I want to run a 1/2 marathon. But I just felt like I was to over weight. I knew I had an athlete inside of me but it was smothered by about 20lbs but mostly by complete self doubt. I sat in silence. Filled with envy. And drowning in my own lack of self worth. I think of all the small things, that lead me to where I am today. Starting with what I like to call "the prop" to the surgery to the breakup, even though every single one of those events sucked more than anything has ever sucked, I'd do them all again exactly the same to be where I am today. I don't ever remember a time where I truly loved myself and believed in who I am and what I am capable of until now and I know each one of those things lead me here. And so wish no more, dream no more and hope no more, now I'm just going to do it!
PS: Update on my car I need a whole new transmission, sweet huh? Well Enterprise wants to charge me extra for a car upgrade for the road trip so I called the dealer that sold me the car and they are going to pay for the upgrade-as they should-and I'll be set with a rocken SUV for the trip. I'm sure Matty will bring his lap top along so you can watch facebook for updates this weekend. I'll for sure blog on Monday since I am taking the day off of work. I need a day to myself and my DVR and just to decompress. Thanks for all your support, suggestions and just for reading my random running thoughts the past 12 weeks. And since Matty reads this I just wanted to say Jesus Poops!