| Riverplex Trainees and our Trainer |
I've spent the last three days in Body Combat training, and I'm thinking maybe I should have just stuck with what I know. I'm sitting here in my Steamboat shirt trying to build my confidence back up from the ground. I need to be reminded that I am good at something. Funny thought, although I suck at BC, I cannot wait to punish myself (and my class) tomorrow in RPM, I need a great RPM class or a great run to get my mind out of this hole. I know I can hit all the elements of being a good instructor, I do it all the time in RPM. I'm a bad ass RPM instructor! But in BC I just can't get the timing down and it makes me feel defeated. I want to keep at it, just so I can prove to myself and everyone that I can be one bad ass bitch when it comes to BC.
Instead I'm simply torn. One part of my mind has a plan of action on how I am going to overcome this obstacle. The other part just wants to stick with what I know. And ya know what is really killing me? I know if I want this-to be a BC instructor-that there is a very good chance that I will not be able to run the Las Vegas FULL marathon. Half yeah I can do that but for the full...I don't know. I simply don't know if I can training for a full marathon and try to do this. I don't think I can do both and man I reallllly wanna run that 26.2, I want that so badly. But I also want to teach Body Combat even if now its just to prove that I can.
Right now, I simply don't know. I wish it was Tuesday, I need a good loooong run to clear my mind. Fuck it, I may even just get up with the sun tomorrow, just so I can clear my head and get my power back. Then tear it apart in RPM and show myself that I do indeed posses all the key elements of a great instructor.
I said I would lose weight, so I lost 30lbs. I said I would be an RPM instructor, and I am, in fact I am told all the time how great I am at. I said I would be a DJ and I rock every day on a freaking radio station, I am on the radio people! I said I would run a 1/2 marathon, I've ran 2 and am about to start training for a third. I've been winning medals in local races, I was asked to be on the local run team. People look to me for running advice now. I do everything, everything, I set out to, always have. I've tasted victory. I'm tasting defeat. Which one will I eat?
I said I would lose weight, so I lost 30lbs. I said I would be an RPM instructor, and I am, in fact I am told all the time how great I am at. I said I would be a DJ and I rock every day on a freaking radio station, I am on the radio people! I said I would run a 1/2 marathon, I've ran 2 and am about to start training for a third. I've been winning medals in local races, I was asked to be on the local run team. People look to me for running advice now. I do everything, everything, I set out to, always have. I've tasted victory. I'm tasting defeat. Which one will I eat?
| My bibs, signs, awards and medals, see I really don't always suck! |

